Friend-zone

Have you ever been friend-zoned? Wait, don’t answer that. I have no scientific proof, still I believe that at least once in our life time we’ve been placed there.

Unless you’re like I am, an insecure and modest little thing that positions herself right there. And it’s not because I don’t like him, it’s because I love him.

The other day I was talking with my best friend about a boy I really really really like. When I showed her our conversations, she noticed something I’ve been doing for quite a while, which is that I sink myself into the friend-zone.

“I can’t believe you’re the one saying it.” she said, referring to all the nouns I use to deflect my feelings. I call him amigo, dude, bro, mijo, nene, mein Freund, mon ami, pende, loco and worst, mi hermanito del alma.

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[Source: That afternoon by Natalia Marie]

That afternoon I went home to reflect about the situation. Why am I denying my feelings towards him? He’s shown me countless times he’s interested, he’s never said it, I doubt it.

The unknown leaves words unspoken. The mystery behind his thoughts haunts me, I never know what he truly says, what he truly means. Is it a confession or a joke? Flirting or being nice?

If I confess my feelings, I risk everything. I’m not afraid of being rejected and I’d rejoice knowing his feelings reciprocated. Despite these ideas, there’s still a chance that if I do become his girlfriend, I may lose him if we break up or if he doesn’t like me, then he just may feel awkward and not want to talk to me anymore.

I’m scared of the outcome. I don’t want to lose someone I love. It’s better to have him as a friend than have nothing at all.

So yeah, I like being in the friend-zone. I find peace within it and it’s safer for us.

[Featured Image Source: Another perspective by Natalia Marie]

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